It's like you're scrubbing the driveway every time you get to an intersection
Then again, we can't be sure that it really doesn't do anything, so we have to keep pushing it for fear that something terrible will happen. I'm tempted to make a LOST reference, but I wont....
...
Ah, what the heck
We have to keep pushing the button or something bad may or may not happen!
I've been told that pushing the button sends some sort of signal that tells the light to change faster, but I don't believe it; I've read psychological studies before, and psychologists are like the biggest liars ever, and they don't even feel bad about it because it's for science. All social experiments are just their excuses to play us all for suckers.
Maybe I shouldn't be telling you this... If the APA realizes that I'm onto them, they'll probably send their ninjas to come and bump me off.
Ah well. If I go missing, I need you all to warn the people that the crosswalk button is a sham. They must be told. I have faith in you.
Godspeed readers.
4 comments:
Dude. I actually have always thought that if you push the button it stalls the light. So if impatient people push it like.. sixty times.. they get punished for it. ;) But then, I always think everything is against me...
1. There are some intersections where the little walking man won't pop up if the button hasn't been pushed, even if the light changes because there are cars waiting. Like the intersection in Provo between the library and the 7-Eleven. I don't know how many times I've gotten there as the light changes and had to wait for the light to change again twice (because if there are no pedestrians the light for the cars crossing University Ave is super short). So sometimes, the button does do something. Ha! Theory debunked.
2. It's kind of like elevator buttons. I know that the elevator won't come any faster because I push the button more or harder or hold it down longer, but I STILL DO IT.
3. It's a universal law. There is a button there. Buttons exist to be pushed. Therefore I must push that button.
That is all.
Also, you totally stole the idea for this post from my head, but then twisted it in your own sick way. Because I was going to do one about why people continue to push elevator/crosswalk buttons after the first time, like it will affect how fast the light changes.
If you go missing, hopefully they'll let you keep blogging. Maybe ninja's capturing you and putting you in a house, on a hill, filled with millions of cats (that are fed on federal dollars), so you can draw and blog and what not all day wouldn't be too bad, eh?
Post a Comment