I gave blood today. Partially for the snacks, partially because I like the color of blood, but mostly because I'm a freaking saint. Plus it makes me feel totally hardcore, especially cause I bleed well and I don't get lightheaded or flinch at the needle; when everybody else is turning white and passing the heck out, I can just leap out of my chair and be on my merry way. It's like I just took a bullet then shrugged it off, like "What, that? That was nothing. Just lost a pint of blood, it's no problem." And then I pick up my bazooka and go back to battling velociraptors, then later I go home and cauterize the wound myself with a car cigarette lighter.... cause I'm hardcore! ... But I digress.
Anyhoo, today, I noticed that almost all the phlebotomists there were guys, and that every single one of them looked like a model for GQ. Usually when I give blood there's maybe one dude like that in the whole group, but this time it was all of them. I am highly suspicious... It makes me wonder just what they're trying to pull...Seems like some sort of conspiracy to me.
Am I complaining that the guys taking blood were all ludicrously attractive? Of course not. I'm just always suspicious of sexy phlebotomists because the only other ridiculously attractive beings who make it a common practice to take blood from people are vampires. It'd be a pretty easy way to lay low if they worked at a blood drive, that's all I'm sayin'... Highly suspect, particularly now that they're showing up en masse. I'm onto their little game. I know they're up to something...
Or that could just be the blood loss speaking... Either way, I'm out. Toodles!