Have you ever had a dream that plays out like a movie with all the typical story elements, plot twists, and so forth? Has your movie dream ever been a horror movie? Mine was the other night, which is strange because usually my dreams don't have plots, but this one did. Of course, there was one main difference with mine that either serves as a sad testament to my blandness, or as an indicator of my intelligence and foresight. Personally, I tend to believe the former, but I digress. So, it seems that, in this dream, I was on my way to a piano lesson taught by an old woman in a wheelchair who lived in a large creepy old house and didn't talk or go outside very much. As there was no front door on the house (or there was, it just required a lot of scaling of house siding that I wasn't really keen on doing) I went around to the side door and found that it had been, not kicked, not smashed, but HATCHETED open! I instantly became wary and I looked past the wrecked door into the room beyond, which was piled so high with junk that I couldn't really see anything. It was at this time that two other girls came along and said that they were students of this woman too and were really worried because she wasn't answering her phone. It was dark, and we all had flashlights, and the two girls said that we should go inside the house and look for her -- typical horror movie setup. However, it was at this point that, instead of reluctantly agreeing and following them inside as movie lore would dictate, I gave them a patronizing look and said something to the effect of "What? No! That would be the stupid thing to do! We're going to call the police and wait for them out here." I then proceeded to spend the rest of the dream preventing people from going into the house while we waited for the police.
Of course, this is the way I would do it if this actually happened in real life. Heck if I lose out on an adventure, I'm not about to subject myself to the sight of the old lady's dismembered corpse stuffed in a wooden trunk while I wait to be massacred by a hatchet-wielding psycho. Nuts to that! Still, I'd have thought that in my dreams I'd be at least a bit more adventurous and impulsive, resulting in a decently entertaining movie dream, but apparently this is not the case. Nice to know my dreams are so honest about my personality, but since dreams with plots are so rare for me, it would be nice to have a little excitement in there that doesn't involve singing naked for a full opera house or all my teeth falling out....
I mean, really! I didn't even know it was actually possible to bore yourself awake! Heaven help me if my blandness now follows me into my dreams.
Like alcohol and heavy machinery, jelly beans and ketchup, or Hannah Montana and feature-length movies, reality and dreams are two things that, if you can avoid it, you should definitely never mix, lest you be very VERY sad.